I think one of the most difficult, but, at the same time, compassionate aspects of the grief journey is that it slows us down.
Our cultural tendency is to string our thoughts and our commitments together with no space in between. We are a nation in a hurry . . . just listen to the voices of the news, talking fast and full of urgency. I don’t think that pace is helpful and I know it is simply impossible when your heart is aching. So, grief naturally slows down so we can take in what is changing in our lives and hearts. We instinctively understand that rushing keeps us from noticing the “now”. . . . and “now” is all we truly have.
So, in our grief support group, we always begin with a moment of quiet before we start to talk. That is to honor our need for a margin between where we have been and where we are now. Margins allow us to bring all of ourselves to this moment. We can take a deep breath and intentionally enter into what comes next.